Let’s Start at the Very Beginning (Part II)….

If you haven’t read Part I yet, I strongly encourage you to read that first in order to get the full perspective.

So my wife and I were high school sweethearts, while we were dating, I made what I can look back on now as my first attempt to explore my feminine identity with her.  For Halloween one year we were going trick-or-treating with some friends and I decided I wanted to go as a cheerleader.  Well of course she had uniforms so she gave me one that I could use as a costume.  However, when we got to her friends house and I changed into skirt and sweater, upon seeing me she freaked and insisted I take it off and go as something else. As I look back on it now, I realize that I felt safe enough with her to try exploring my feelings of gender.  However, her extremely negative reaction simply reinforced all the shame I had internalized throughout my childhood.  So I continued to deny what I was feeling and tucked it neatly back in that little box. Continue reading “Let’s Start at the Very Beginning (Part II)….”

Let’s Start at the Very Beginning (Part I)….

“Let’s start at the very beginning”, in the words of Julie Andrews, “it’s a very good place to start”.  So how did I end up as a 39 year-old who has thrown their whole life into upheaval in order to transition to living as female?  How did I not determine this sooner?  Why transition now?  Did I always know I was a woman?  It’s taken me some time and a lot of psycho-therapy to find the answers to these questions but let me dig right in. Continue reading “Let’s Start at the Very Beginning (Part I)….”